The Yule blog

‘Twas the week before Christmas
And all through Beth’s house
Not a present was a wrapped
She felt like a louse

Beth looked at the pile
Of presents with a glare
“Bah humbug,” she cried,
“This just isn’t fair!”

“I’ve been shopping for weeks,
My head’s in a funk
My wallet is empty
I’d rather get drunk!”

“But I’m stuck at home
With all of this fuss
I’d rather be celebrating
Christmas like a lush.”

Tempted by lagers,
Martinis and porters,
She then remembered
What the doctor had ordered

“Lay off of the alcohol
For you, no more beer…
Ok, maybe a little bit
For holiday cheer.”

A small amount she can drink
Which makes her feel glad
Cause she wants to make up
For all the years she’s been bad

So she went back to wrapping
The presents she’d boast
Were expensive enough
For those she loved most

There’s big sis and mother,
Lil’ sister and bro,
Their in-laws and babies,
With eyes all aglow

There’s a whole bunch of girlfriends,
The coworker crew,
Last but not least of all
Bloggers like you

You all make her feel
Especially loved
Making her thank
The heavens above

Time to wrap up this poem
Cause it’s getting quite cheesy
But it came from the heart
And that shit ain’t easy

So to you, may I wish,
With all of my might,
A Christmas and New Year
That’s joyful and bright!


~ by Binibining Beth on December 16, 2008.

14 Responses to “The Yule blog”

  1. chappy chanukah and kwayzy kwanzaa and tip top tet and ramalamadingdong ramadan, too.

  2. AWWWWWWWWW that was definatly cheesy but yet kinda cool. Merry Christmas Beth. They say it’s not the gift but the thought.

    So I’ll be thinking bout you. Yep. You. The next time I have my happy alone time. You’ll be the subject.

  3. Very creative, Beth, and I love the colors too!!

  4. wow you.

    that’s pretty damn good.

    so good – i’m considering stealing it and putting my name on it – so if you read it “somewhere” else…say nothing 🙂

  5. The doc said to lay off the alcohol?? I’d find another doctor! 😆

    I totally cracked up about the “from the heart and that shit ain’t easy” part of the poem. It was beautiful. 🙂

    Did you wrap those presents yet?

  6. Beth stinks.

  7. Beth rocks! I love my card. Thank you for thinking of me this holiday season. May your new year be filled with a lots of doctors who prescribe beer!

  8. Love ya. Merriest of Christmases to you.

  9. I’m glad y’all enjoyed my poem. Took me half an hour to start it and about an hour to finish it. And I owe a lot of the finishing touches to Tinyhands, who is far more clever than I am. He came up with the title and a couple of lines in the poem too. But I can assure you that about 78% of the poem is a Beth original. 🙂

  10. 60% of the time it works every time.

  11. Congratulations, Tinyhands. If my WordPress Dashboard is to be believed, you just made the 800th comment on my blog!

    800! You people amaze me every day!

  12. Merry Christmas, dear one! 🙂

  13. I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again…NICE

  14. Hey Beth Happy New Year. Hope everything goes your way.

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