Sam and I took the body flow class tonight. It’s a combination of Pilates, Yoga and Tai Chi. I was hesitant at first because the last time I tried yoga at home, I damn near pulled every muscle in my body. But the trainers were great. By the end of our session, when we were doing our deep meditation, I felt fantastic! And hungry! So Sam and I went to McDonalds for a quick snack. =P

While we were doing our deep meditation, I have to admit, mine wasn’t as deep as it was supposed to have been. To be honest, I didn’t really know how I was supposed to “let go of our heart, body and mind.”

In fact, I’d go so far as to admit that I have problems letting go of things. And that’s what I was thinking about while meditating. I’ve been told, just recently, that I am obsessive and that I resemble a pit bull – I take a bite and hold on for dear life. And I don’t know why. I guess when I think something’s good, I want to hold on to it for as long as I can, until it slaps me in the face with a newspaper and yells out “bad Beth, bad bad Beth!”

I can’t even count the number of times people have told me to freakin’ relax. I don’t know why it’s taken me this long to realize what all of you may have already known, that I am one uptight and confused individual.

I know it’s a problem, and knowing’s half the battle, right? Well, I took my first step into letting go tonight – see, Beth is trying to relax – SEE?!?


~ by Binibining Beth on September 20, 2004.

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