Summer glow
“What’s the matter, Beth? You look depressed today.”
Well, that’s something I never heard of before. Often I hear something like, “You look good today” or “You look sick today,” but I don’t like to hear either one cause the former implies I don’t look good every day and the latter implies that, well, I look sick. But depressed? How does one even look depressed? I don’t normally walk around moping or pouting and I’ve stayed away from wearing dark, gloomy colors. In fact, I’ve even made it a point to wear light-colored and lightweight outfits because it’s been pretty damn hot lately.
And it hasn’t been easy to keep cool. I spent nearly two hours on Sunday waxing my car. My baby looked fah-bu-lous! She’s so shiny and so smooth, you can eat off of it. And then Monday morning came and brought along Mother Nature’s wrath, pouring buckets of rain all over my hard work and sweat. Lots of sweat. It was not pretty.
At the last hour before I hit the hay, I turn my A/C up to deep freeze. I want it to be cold enough for me to sleep under the covers because it feels unnatural for me to sleep above the covers. Hey, if God had intended us to sleep above the covers He would not have invented blankets! But either it’s getting really really hot lately or my A/C’s not working that well because I’d wake up to find my blankets on the floor. And I’m sweating!
What’s with all the sweating? A little summer glow is good, I suppose, but this is ridiculous!
iBeth
So the new iPhone comes out today. You can get to the internet faster! Whoop-de-freaking-do! God forbid I’m ever out and about and I can’t get to your blogs in lightning speed!
But I think this is a good time for me to talk about cell phones as my current two-year plan with Verizon will be ending in exactly 4 weeks and it’s about time I get a new phone. My current phone has served me well but I’m pretty sure a newer one will serve me even better…..cause I am just a smidgeon less materialistic than those who are brainwashed by the iPhone-mania (but I am oodles more hypocritical).
Anyway, my needs are simple when it comes to cell phones. I need it to be light and compact, I have enough crap in my purse. I need a full keyboard for text messaging. I can’t imagine how I ever lived with an alpha-numeric keypad before, cause I don’t have the patience to press 1 a gazillion times just so I can spell out :-P.
I need a phone with some kind of GPS on it. While I don’t need GPS (on principle if I’m ever lost and I can’t find my own way back, then I deserve to be lost forever), it’s a nice backup to have when I’m not in my own car where I carry several maps. And trust me, I’ve been in plenty of other people’s cars who don’t have maps and my VZ Navigator saved the day. Frankly, I don’t like the idea that someone or something knows exactly where I am every second of the day. Ever seen “Enemy of the State”?
I don’t need Bluetooth capability cause I’m not an asshole.
I don’t need an mp3 player. I have an mp3 player that’s about the size of my pinkie finger. Okay, I exaggerate but it’s tiny enough that I can afford to carry another piece of equipment in my purse without it getting in the way.
While my last couple of phones had a camera in it, it’s not necessary. I still have my compact digicam and my D40 that I carry with me where ever and when ever I can. Besides, the picture quality in most phones are crap anyway.
I don’t need internet connection. I think I’d start hating myself if I ever become so dependent on the internet that I need it to be available to me everywhere I go.
I don’t need motion-sensing games, or any digital games for that matter. I have a Nintendo DS, a rubik’s cube and a wooden paddle with a bouncy ball tied to the paddle. That’s all I need to keep me entertained.
But what I need to really consider is my carrier. I have been a loyal Verizon customer since I got my 
first job in public accounting 7 years ago! Seven years, folks! Have you ever been someone’s client/customer for that long? And in all those years, I have never had a complaint. Okay, I get a couple of dropped calls once in a while, there are still some areas where that huge crowd of Verizon employees hasn’t been able to follow me around (like the top of Mauna Kea, Glenwood Springs, a cruise ship on the Atlantic Ocean) but no phone company is perfect in that respect.
But the thing of it is, my sisters are all on T-Mobile. And if I switch to T-Mobile I can be one of their “Faves” (as if I wasn’t already their favorite) and we can talk, literally, forever! Not that I want to talk to my sisters forever, they have a tendency of picking on me and being annoying, but at least I know that I have that option.
I don’t know. I’m so torn. What do you guys think?
Blogtinis
Last night, over a couple of martinis, made all the more delicious because of their special $4 price, I was finally able to meet the person behind one of my favorite blogs, Complete and Total Bisch.
We had a very nice time chatting it up about, oh, a whole buncha stuff, some of which is classified information. And by classified, I mean, sucks to be you for not being there!
I was amazed that it didn’t take me long to get over my natural nervousness over meeting new people. Granted, Karen’s not technically a new person since I’ve read her blog for a couple of years now, so I was already sort of comfortable talking to her. Although, I have to admit, I may have still been a little nervous because it felt like I was rambling a lot, which I have a tendency of doing when I, for some reason, feel the need to impress people with my conversational skills, which, at its best, is enough to pass ESL standards, apparently*.
Anyway, I couldn’t help reminiscing over my very first blog-meet, and how terribly nervous I was back then, not to mention, completely freaked out! Last night was so much easier than that first blog-meet two years (has it been that long??) ago, mostly because I didn’t have to fly for four hours to meet Karen. All I had to do was drive to Jersey City. Although I did have to parallel park, which I suck at, and then I had to decipher some strange, ethnic symbols they call “parking signs.” But it was so worth it.
Last night was definitely good times. Good company, good conversation, good drinks, good times all around!
*There’s a story that happened yesterday at work that made me think of ESL standards that you’ll have to remind me to tell you some other time.
Happy Fourth!
Okay, I just misspelled my own name on a letter I wrote to the IRS. I think it’s time to go home!
Time to shut down your computers, turn off all the lights and get an early start to this long weekend. Mine’s extra long since I was smart enough to ask for Monday off. So, *pbffft* to all of yous.
I am so ready to celebrate Independence Day. I’m wearing a blue top, a white skirt and red undies. Oh, wait, I think that’s French. Never mind.
I’ll also be celebrating my fourth year of blogging at the end of this month! Be ready for The Beth Quiz!
And that’s all I got, so make it a great holiday weekend, folks!
Courtesy of The Gallery of Unfortunate Fourth of July Cards.
The Deposition
You know, I wish someone had told me I had nothing to worry about today. Oh no wait, everyone did!
I spent the whole night last night fretting that everything would go wrong with the deposition. Like, I’d lose focus and say the wrong thing, or I’d get to the wrong place and end up missing the deposition or I’d lose courage and fall apart crying in front of the lawyers, the plaintiff (who will be referred to from now on as the Dirty, Greedy, Money-Grubbing Douchebag, or The Douchebag for short), the court reporter and God.
But none of that happened. Well, with the exception of my lawyer showing up half an hour late and adding 10 years of wear and tear to my already aggravated nervous system. He apologized and did a fantastic job of prepping me for the deposition, so I forgave him.
I’ve never been deposed before but my lawyer reassured me there’s nothing to be nervous about. He gave me strict instructions to be truthful and careful when I speak, especially since the ever-vigilant court reporter will be recording every little thing that is said. Everything, did you say? You mean, if I said, “Boom shaka laka laka,” I can ask the court reporter to repeat what I just said?
But no, no time for funny business. This is serious, grown-up stuff. I’m being sued, for God’s sake!
So, I put on my serious face and steeled myself for the questions to start. But I immediately stumbled when the court reporter told me to raise my right hand and asked me if I swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but? I panicked! With the first question!! I mean, do I say, “Yes, ma’am”? It felt really weird for me to be saying, “I do” cause isn’t that just for weddings? Grammatically speaking, though, shouldn’t I answer, “I will” cause technically, I will be telling the truth with all its wholey goodness?
I forget what I said. In fact, the rest of the deposition was a blur. I may have choked on a few, seemingly simple questions. But the friggin’ court reporter was unnerving! She was just sitting there, with her little machine-thingy, being all calm and cool. It bugged me! She asked me to spell my Mom’s name (who was at the accident at the time), and I’m like, “how the hell are you taking all this? There are no letters on your machine!! Tell me, woman!!”
You’d be proud of me, though. I could’ve seriously cracked but I didn’t. Well, not so much that anyone noticed.
I’m glad it’s over. My lawyer tried to convince me that there is nothing to worry about. The next step is arbitration, he said, but that won’t be for a while. And even when it gets to that, my lawyers and insurance company will take care of everything. I have nothing to worry about.
Yeah right. Have you met me??
Sunday storm
I was spending a lazy Sunday afternoon cleaning up my filing cabinet, getting ready for the deposition this Tuesday, when I started hearing thunder outside. I thought nothing of it since the weather men actually got it right this time with their thunderstorm forecast. I went back to my filing when I thought I heard someone throw a rock at my window. I peeked out the window and, of course, saw no one outside. The window in my bedroom overlooks my neighbor’s neat backyard, a backyard that my neighbor hardly ever uses. He never barbecues in that yard, he doesn’t even have outdoor furniture. He doesn’t hang out to admire his yard work or wonder if today would be the day I forget to close the blinds while I change.
I ignored the noise, but just as I turned around, I heard several other taps on my window. And that’s when I saw it - ice on my windowsill. A second later, several other chunks of ice fell and the next thing I know, it’s raining ice!
It may not be unheard of to have hail during the first official weekend of the summer, but this hail storm only lasted about 30 minutes and as soon as it was over, the sun shone so brightly and the sky cleared up so quickly, that I thought it was some sign of the apocalypse. But after I while, I realized that the horsemen weren’t coming, so I went back to my filing and turned on the tv. And wouldn’t you know it, they’re showing “Ghostbusters.”
What a perfect way to end my first summer weekend!
It’s so damn hot. Milk was a bad choice.
I’m back from vacation! Well, I’ve been back for a couple of days now, I just haven’t gotten around to blogging about my trip. Why? Well, I’ve been trying to figure out how it’s possible that someone could get bronchitis from Denver, what with all their clean, Rocky mountain air and all the supposedly therapeutic hot springs. Okay, maybe not bronchitis, but it’s a terrible cough/cold nevertheless. My ex-boyfriend informs me that it might be a tumor.
Each time I cough it feels like someone’s pinching the back of my head. I haven’t had a decent night’s sleep since I got back because of the nasty coughing fits I get in the middle of the night. I’ve missed a couple of days of work last week because of it and while that’s not a crying shame, I would’ve liked to have done something more fun on those days off than coughing out my lungs.
But anyway, my trip to Denver was very nice. If you haven’t clicked on my sidebar to see the pics, here’s your chance. I got to see a Rockies game, which was a lot of fun. They played against the Brewers, who were kicking ass in the first 6 innings of the game. When the Rockies were down 4 to 1, Bill and I decided it’s time to leave and meet up with his friends at a bar nearby. By the time we got to the bar, the Rockies miraculously pulled a 6-4 win! I hate missing come-from-behind games like that!
We met up with Bill’s friends, had a few drinks and eventually went home.
The following day, Bill and I drove west to Glenwood Springs and took a long, lovely dip in natural hot springs. It was fantastic! It was better than a spa. Well, except for the fact that there were a bunch of annoying little boys ages 14-16 who insisted on playing Marco Polo loudly. Oh, if only they knew that being immature like that would keep them from losing their virginity for another year or so.
On Sunday, we had lunch in Vail and headed to a town called Canon City where they have the Royal Gorge, which has the world’s highest suspension bridge. Built in 1929, the bridge is a marvel in gravity-defiance. We parked the car at one end of the brigde and decided to walk across its quarter-mile length of uneven wooden planks. I cannot stress how uneven these planks are. At certain points, the gap in between the wooden planks were so big that you could look down and clearly see the roaring Arkansas river 1,500 feet below.
Have I mentioned that I’m afraid of heights? Oh yes. It’s a mild fear, compared to other fears I run away from. But it was a windy day that day and every time a car drove past us, the bridge shook, making my knees weaker and weaker by the minute. I dared a couple of times to walk to the side of the bridge, hold on for dear life and look down. When we made it across, I wanted to start praying my thanks to every god there is out there when I realized that we still have to walk back!
We walked around for a bit, saw some jackasses and bighorns, not to mention some burros and rams (wink wink). Then we started the long walk back across the bridge. This time, I decided to walk in the middle of the bridge and tried not to look down. Having nothing else to hold on to, I put a kung-fu grip on my camera and held my breath the rest of the way. Bill tried to keep my mind occupied by talking about something meaningful or was it something trivial? I don’t know, I forget. But cross that bridge, I did and face my fear, I conquered, so booyah!
The rest of my trip in Denver was relatively quiet, spent watching movies and some of our favorite epsiodes of “The Office.” My flight from Denver to Newark was uneventful, except for meeting the most talented flight attendant ever. He had such a lovely singing voice and had such a knack for singing about anything and nothing at all. He asked me if I wanted anything to drink, and I said I just wanted him to sing, so sing he did and I fell right to sleep. I woke up to find myself in Newark, schweating in my fleece sweater that I had bought in Vail to keep me warm. Apparently, I had just missed the year’s first heat-wave in the tri-state area. Lucky me.
It’s still pretty hot, but the temperature doesn’t read three digits anymore, so thank God for small favors, I suppose. I have a pretty busy week ahead of me and the last thing I need is to be hot and bothered and coughing and heavily medicated. Hmmmm….Nyquil.
May Day 30
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- I went to a baseball game today
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- I kind of wondered what it was like to watch a baseball game 20 years ago. I'm sure beer was not $8.00 back then.
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- Old Shea meets....
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- ...the brand new Citi Field Stadium
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- Who in their right mind would bring a newborn baby to a baseball game when there's a threat of thunderstorm?
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- A couple of foul balls flew up in the same area and it looked like the same people or same group of people caught the balls. Lucky bastards.
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- The little boy eventually got punched in the stomach by the boy he was playing with. I guess he got tired of being flashed.
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- We were getting bored with the game, so we decided to leave at the bottom of the 7th when the Mets were down by 2. I took this picture thinking they sure could use a homerun right about now to get back into this ball game. And wouldn't you know it, as we were getting into the train station, someone did and they eventually won it! I'd be happy for them, except it's the Mets, so I couldn't care less.
Ps. WordPress gave me such a hard time posting this picture gallery that I actually went over midnight, but I’m counting this post towards May 31st. So, I managed 30 posts in 31 days. I’d say I earned myself a well-earned kudos! Anyway, if you want to see the full sized pictures, just click on my sidebar, they’re in flickr now.
May Day 29
Today was a really good day. Well, except for the fact that my left ring finger feels like I bumped it really hard into something, and the fact that I ran into a glass door at lunchtime and was laughed at by little brats, and the fact that I’ve been searching for good dark-wash jeans for several days now to no avail. Yeah, other than those things, it was a good day.
We had clear, bright blue skies, low humidity, a slight breeze here and there, with temperatures going up to 80 degrees only. And we had that kind of weather all week-long.
Around 3pm today, we had to turn off our computers for a server upgrade, leaving us with no work to do, so my boss very generously let us out early, treating a couple of us to a round of beer at our favorite watering hole. Free beer is the best kind of beer there is.
I gave up soda this week. I’ve been soda-free for three whole days. Been drinking gallons of water ever since and peeing like a race horse soon afterwards.
A friend remarked on the fact that it doesn’t seem to bother me to be talking about Hawai’i. I suppose she had expected me to loathe the thought of Hawai’i because of the breakup. Hawai’i was heaven on earth and no ex-boyfriend can ruin that for me.
So I had thoughts of Hawai’i for the rest of the day and it made me feel great.
Yeah, today was a really good day.
May Day 28
Folks, this is what a $22.00 lunch looks like. At the top left are two of New Jersey’s best unagi - that’s cooked eel for you non-adventurous types. The bright purply thing in the middle is an orchid - not eatable. The bright green thing at the top right is wasabi, just the kind of thing to clear your sinuses. The pink rectangular pieces are two delicious, melt-in-your-mouth, fresh raw tuna sashimi. And the group of rolled-up rice pieces on the bottom left is called the New York roll, which is made up of salmon (raw), cucumber and green apple pieces.
This lunch is one of my favorite lunches. Since it’s quite expensive for one meal for one person, I only have it on special occasions. And today’s special occasion? Why, it’s Thursday!
May Day 27
So I got my hairscut this evening and it looks terrifying!! There was an unfortunate language barrier between my stylist and I. When I said I wanted long layers, she made short layers. When I said I wanted my hair blow-dried straight, she blow-dried it curly. And not just curly, she made them uber-curly! My hair looks like I got a perm!
I walked into the salon with soft, straight hair and walked out with curly twigs. She used nearly an entire bottle of mousse, scrunched my hair with her hands, then tossed and turned my head like a bean bag, and voila! Chia Beth!
But the thing is, I’m not at all upset. She still managed to keep the length of my hair to my shoulders, which is where I wanted it to be and she did manage to add volume where all others have failed. And it was well worth the price of the haircut just to hear this Italian lady try to speak to me in English. Apparently, the only English words she knew were all hair related. No linking verbs. In fact, no verbs at all. She kept trying to explain to me how to recreate the style she made, but all she could say was mousse over and over again. So we played a little game of charades and I won! Yay for me!
I actually took a picture of myself when I got home, but when I saw it, I freaked out. So I washed it down a little, combed it through and now looks somewhat decent. Right?
May Day 26
Was standing in line at the local Target, when a mother-daughter tag team walked up behind me. The daughter must’ve consumed enough sugar to cover Rhode Island because she prattled on and on and on about all the tv shows she watched in one freakin’ day!
But then she started humming a tune that sounded familiar.
“Hey Mom, hey Mom! What’s that show that goes with this song?”
“Which one you talking about?
“You know! You take the good, you take the bad, you something something, something something, the something of life?”
“What?”
“You know! The one with the girl named Tootie?”
“Oh, I think I know….something the Truth of Life?”
“No. That’s not it.”
“The Truth of Living?”
“No! Listen to the song, Mom!”
So she sang it again, got almost all the words right until “the something of life.”
Two minutes! Two whole minutes this went on behind me and I wondered what I ever did wrong to deserve this. When the daughter went into her third attempt to sing the song, I lost it and said, “Surely, you can’t be serious! The show’s called the Facts of Life!”
Daughter squeeled and said, “That’s it! You got it! And don’t call me Shirley!”
Arrggghhh!!!!
I have been waiting ALL my life to make that comeback and this little spaz tricked me with it. I feel sick.
May Day 25
I don’t know why I even bother. 
